unfaded memoirs..

am sitting on the favrioute part of my terrace...the part which is obstructed from prying eyes of the jobless neighbours...the part which is attached to the small orchard behind the house..and the part which is DARK..where the neighrhood light fails to make its way.its just me..the darkness..and the silence all around .The two euclayptus tree..my mates.. hang over the wall...only their black sillhoutes visible againstthe red sky..!The wind..the cold ..steady breeze continuously hit me..!instinctivly i remove the hairband and let my hair loose.. TO let the wind play though it..to toss it around...!its kind of mutual..i like the wind going through my hair.givving it the much needed breathe..and putting up that little rebellion together!invigorated further i plug in my earphones...and start playing james blunt...! and that does it...am carried away..away in the most beautiful world ever created..the world which is just mine..the one created by me...just for me!!i lean back against the wall..look up..stare at the sky..stare at the stars..stare away into oblivion..and wonder in awe at the inexplicable existance of it all..the universe..!after several minutes of this silence tryst betwixt me and the sky above..i close my eyes with blunt softly cooing about his girl and unachieved love story..into my ears.;slowly i drift to where i belonged or more "want to belong even yet";i see him giving that loving gaze as he always used to give me..that special look..that was jeaolusly "mine"..only mine.!one by one all those faded memories with him...like some motion picture jump alive and start playing infront of my eyes..!my heart goes hysterical..starts beating as if theres no tomorrow..!the more i try to dwell into it harder ,expecting to fall back into the time..the more it fades away..until the wind turned into a gust and slappd me hard..pulling me out of the trance...a trance that i would die for to get into again..the trance that can nothing omniscent could ever replace...!! back into reality which wasnt anymore as transcedental as before...;the wind wasnt anything near to a "breeze"..it was picking up..making way for a storm.!the sky which had been so omniscent few minutes ago suddenly seemed so hostileb!Blunt sounded irate..and the trees above,my mates, looked sad and mournful..! As of me...am dazed..angry...and irked..! that unexplained hollow pain in the gut made it way again..as it does everytime since we broke up!am scared lonely and desolate!!and the pain is gettin on my nerves!holding tight...i curl up into a ball as small as possible..shunning myself from the world around.."my world".!
after this initial minutes of isolation passed..the strange pain ceased..i could now think sanely..yea..i am sane again.!few quick deep inhales..and am near to okay..! i look up..look around.close my eyes for a brief moment!a thought crosses me and i smile to myself..!!happy and content.

"maybe it was destined for just a short period of time but it nonetheless was the most beautiful thing ever "